Demonic Toys
Now play nice

When you watch a movie called Demonic Toys, you pretty much know exactly what you're going to get. There isn't going to be a deeper meaning. There aren't going to be serious questions that will make you think. No Oscar-worthy performances or fantastic cinematography. Just a bunch of possessed toys killing the shit out of people. It's just a matter if it will be horrible or tolerable.

Demonic Toys begins with police officers Judith Gray and Matt Cable talking about their relationship while waiting for illegal gun dealers to arrive. Judith tells Matt about a strange recurring dream she is having involving two children surrounded by clocks, playing a game of cards. She also reveals that she is pregnant. The deal with the criminals goes south, leaving Matt dead and one of the dealers critically wounded. A chase ensues into a toy warehouse, where the wounded criminal crawls away into a bizarrely lit shaft of light. The toys come to life and brutally kill him while Judith captures the other criminal. At the same time, a delivery boy, Mark, arrives at the warehouse to deliver security guard, Charneski, his dinner. They find Judith and the captured criminal and when Charneski goes to call for help, he is also attacked by the demonic toys. The toys terrorize Judith, Mark, the criminal, and a young runaway girl that was staying in the warehouse. It is revealed that the spirit of a demon, in the form of the Kid from Judith's dream, is the cause for all the mayhem. The Kid wants to become human and in order to do so, he wants to impregnate Judith so his spirit can transfer to her egg and be born of flesh and blood. Will Judith and Mark survive the toys and stop the Kid demon?

I think I just possessed myself

Like I said before, you pretty much know what you're getting with a movie like this. It's very similar to Puppet Master, and for good reason; Demonic Toys and Puppet Master are both produced by Charles Band and Full Moon Entertainment. The toys themselves are actually pretty cool. You have the foul-mouthed Baby Oopsy Daisy, which reminds me of Chucky, Grizzly Teddy, Mr. Static, and Jack Attack. Sadly, Oopsy Daisy is the only toy with any personality, which is a shame, because it's hysterical. The demon is also full of personality, almost to the point of people more likable than the heroes. The acting is decent all around, but special props go to the Kid for being just the right amount of creepy and charming. There are some fun kills and an acceptable amount of blood. The movie has decent effects for the early 90's and the detail to all the toys is appreciated.

The story itself gets far more complicated that it needs to be. The whole demonic “have sex with a woman to give birth to myself” plot is convoluted and confusing. There's a bizarre flashback meant to explain the process and why the demon is at the warehouse, but it just left me confused. In a movie this simple, it should be impossible to confuse the audience, but they managed to accomplish that task. It also doesn't help that there are lots of plot holes in the movie. Why is there only one point of escape in the entire warehouse? At one point, Grizzly Teddy turns into a huge monster. If the demon could do that, why didn't he just turn all the toys into large monsters? The ending itself is downright baffling and I won't even attempt to explain it. I know it's silly to over-think a movie called Demonic Toys, but I just can't help myself.

When your laundry needs a vicious fabric softener

Demonic Toys is a fun movie as long as you don't think too much. There is plenty of excitement and action with an interesting cast of villains. The acting is fine, which is actually a huge compliment when it comes to direct-to-video horror movies. The story itself does get over-complicated and can be confusing at times. If you like Child's Play and Puppet Master, you'll get a kick out of Demonic Toys.

6/10